written by:

Kay Bolter, PhD

Nicole Bolter, PhD

The authors incorporate their deep caring, empathy, and decades of experience into this book, and share true stories to connect with. The Self-Regulated Eater reignites a calming joy in a person’s day-to-day interactions with food and self.

Grechen L. George | PhD, RDN

Associate Professor of Nutrition and Dietetics

Beautifully laid out and engaging. The simulated therapist/client sessions make the process come alive and help the reader anticipate the common inner conflicts that arise when using your body’s hunger and fullness cues.

Raya Almufti | MD

Psychiatrist and Eating Disorders Specialist

If you've been on more diets than you can count,

you owe it to yourself to try something different.

Welcome to The Self-Regulated Eater: Trust Your Body, Trust Yourself, Transform Your Eating!

The Self-Regulated Eater will teach you to:

Enjoy eating again instead of feeling guilty and food obsessed

Trust yourself to stop eating when you feel comfortably full

Eat when you’re physically hungry and not for other reasons

Cope with your emotions without relying on food

Eat your favorite foods without fearing a binge

These changes (and many more!) are possible, but not through dieting. The Self-Regulated Eater offers a sustainable, psychology-driven strategy that will free you from emotional eating, food restrictions, and feelings of deprivation.

The authors, a mother-and-daughter team of psychology experts, will guide you on a deeply introspective journey as you transition from the external control of a diet mindset to internal regulation. Your struggles will be validated and your triumphs celebrated as you forever change your relationship with food, eating, and yourself. It is time to make your efforts last. It is time for self-regulated eating.

What Does It Mean to Trust My Body and Myself?

Trusting your body means learning to recognize and respond to your internal cues for hunger, fulness, and satisfaction. People often say, “eat when you’re hungry and stop when you’re full” but that’s not so simple. Especially if you are a chronic dieter and have lost your connection with your physical eating cues.

You may not be fully aware of the thoughts and feelings that trigger eating decisions and lead to emotional eating or bingeing. For example, what if you recognize you’re physically full, but still continue to eat past the point of fullness? You’ll build up the strength of your body’s signals so you can actually listen and depend on them. And when you trust yourself to make eating choices that honor your unique needs, you will unlock the key to lasting change.

What Does It Mean to Transform My Eating?

As you become a self-regulated eater, your food preferences will change. Contrary to your fears, your body will tell you it wants a wide variety of foods --not just food high in fat, carbs, or added sugars. Your physical eating signals will reignite, and you will start to feel the sensations of satisfaction, fullness, and hunger spontaneously.

You will notice you are eating less food as you stop eating when you are full, and eating only when you’re hungry and foods that are satisfying to you. You will also experience fewer episodes of emotional eating and bingeing. You will not feel deprived or restricted because you can choose foods that are satisfying to you, including previously forbidden ones, and not feel guilty. Gone is the need to rebel!

Why Should You Trust Us?

Good question! We are a mother-daughter team who wrote this book based on our professional expertise and passion for helping people. Lead author Dr. Kay Bolter is a clinical psychologist with over 30 years’ experience working with eating disorders. Her co-author and daughter is Dr. Nicole Bolter who is a professor in sport and exercise psychology and has years of research and writing experience.

Our goal is to make you feel supported, confident, and affirmed as you begin this new approach. Your truth is the truth, and whatever you are thinking or feeling is valid.

What Can I Expect From The Book?

The Self-Regulated Eater is a comprehensive, step-by-step experiential guide to support your journey to become a self-regulated eater. During the four-week process, we'll introduce you to Julie, a fictional client, and you will be privy to six of her simulated therapy sessions that take place during her transformation to become a self-regulted eater.

Alongside Julie, the reader will be prompted to complete their own thought-provoking assignments and self-assessments to help them apply what their learning to their eating in real time. In addition, over twenty interactive actual client scenarios will be featured so the reader can see a variety of ways self-regulated eating can be achieved. They will be able to identify will common emotional issues and not feel alone with thier struggles with eating, something they may not ever experience before.

photo of Kay Bolter, PhD

Kay Bolter, PhD

is a clinical psychologist with 30+ years of experience specializing in the treatment of eating disorders. Using the therapeutic approach illustrated in The Self-Regulated Eater, Dr. Bolter has treated hundreds of clients struggling with emotional and binge eating.

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photo of Nicole Bolter, PhD

Nicole Bolter, PhD

is a professor in the kinesiology department at San Francisco State University, with expertise in sport and exercise psychology. Her recent research centered on combating weight stigma through pedagogical interventions for future allied heath professionals.

connect with me on linkedin →

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